Sunday, June 7, 2009

Pregnancy Annoyances

After an exciting evening at the Luau, I've realized that there are a few things less tolerable when pregnant.
1). Obnoxiously drunk people. This is always the case, but pre-pregnant me would join in on the drinking festivities so that the tolerance for this behavior increased as the alcohol consumption increased. Now I have no choice but to be the sober, annoyed, pregnant chick. So to all the drunks, yes I love you too. Hanging all over me, rubbing my belly, and telling me that you love me 400 times just might not get the point across as well as you think. Next time try renting a billboard that has our picture on it of you rubbing my belly that says you love me. I'll get the picture then.
2). Loud music. I sound like one of those old farts complaining about their noisy neighbors or rowdy grandchildren. I'm 23 and having to scream to carry on a conversation is no longer in the realm of a "good time" to me.
3). Hearing the questions, "So when are you due?" followed by "And how many do you have in there?". Of course these questions aren't asked unless you are pregnant, but the more and more I hear how big I am or if I'm having multiples, the less and less of a happy person I become. I have better prepared myself for the correct response when asked this in the future. The response will be "I'm due tomorrow and I am having a litter. If you're curious as to the names, they will all be known as Crap Bag."
4). The smell of beer or liquor of any kind. Just makes me nauseous. Especially when its on the breath of those mentioned in 1.
5). Last but not least, people who can't do math to save their lives. This annoyed me previously, but even more so now when trying to answer the question of "How far along are you?" Or "When are you due?". If I am due September 6th of THIS YEAR, and it is currently the first week of June, no, I am not only 4 months pregnant. Unless a pregnancy lasts 6-7 months you fool, then you can consider me 4 months pregnant.
And that sums up what makes a pregnant woman very easily annoyed.

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